pros and cons

ok so there's a big possibility that I might move to mexico city in january as you all know. BUT there's a lot of things to take in consideration and I hate them because they are important things that I maybe shouldnt overlook or not, so I decided to make a list.

Pros to move to Mexico city
-i Will be working with my cousin's gf who according to them works in a company owned by women and I think they do like commercials and stuff, i'll be the assistant in the art dept. they only work a few times a month but when they do its like 12 to 24 shifts but my cousin said that the rest of the time i can dedicate to paint. so the Pro is working in the art community

- This will hurt more than I can imagine, but leaving faith and the kids I think will be the only way for me to find closure being a couple of blocks away fails and I always look for them.

-living in a more diverse population has always been a plus

-mexico city (hate their pollution problem) but its one important city and will add to my resume.

so cons
- I just started therapy with this psychologist guy, its free thru my insurance and I dont know maybe I should stick longer with it, i have many issues.
-my knee,I found out today, needs more physical therapy, which wont take more than a month but still its going to take 9 months to completly heal so if I leave I wont see my doctor but my dad says from here its up to me how well I heal and I dont necessary need a doctor, but then again my dad is Mr no-worries.
-I need to get my GED, I only needed to pass ONE subject to graduate from highschool but then I decided to go to California and never took care of it, im trying to do it now but the process its going to take at least 2 mother fucking months.
-I already feel alone but I have two good friends from highschool that we kept in touch thru email these last 13 years, its not the same connection as my friends back in CA cause, well they havent been with me all these years. so IF i leave to mexico city I will be left with no-one but ofcourse one can always make friends, its just that i need to pass this co-dependency stage of needing somebody there.
-I havent seen my cousin in 13 years, I heard that he was all into drugs for many years but according to my sister he is now clean and he is making a living as a painter (fine arts) and Dj. I just hope I dont get there and its a dungeon.


ok so therapy, I can always get it in mexico too, but it will be almost impossible since I dont know that city and what hospital my insurance covers. BUT maybe its a good therapy to move.... I'll ask my psychologist on wednesday.
the knee- the fucking knee better heal up fast, I dont have time for her whining.
higschool. fucking highschool. i can also do it in mexico city but like I said, that city is insane and I think it will be a mess to find a follow the protocol there.

i dont have a job here, I cant wait forever to decide to move, money is leaving my pocket and I need to act. i tried to find a job here but so far nothing. Yucatecans are very traditional and im not. at least people who are over 50 who happen most of the time to be the owners of almost everything.

mm so lets think.
next move will be Canada, I wish I could move to Europe but we are broke here in the americans and since I cant enter legally US again (for now) maybe canada will provide the dollars to move to europe. I just need a contact and save more, maybe in a year. who the fuck knows.